I hear people talk about their facebook crush so I decided to play around a little. I’m sure a lot of people can relate with this.

Please enjoy!

Dear Mread,

During a meeting with my boss today, he caught me smiling for no apparent reason and gave me this really confused stare. LOL But, that’s not even new. I catch myself smiling a lot these days, sometimes I even Laugh Out Loud and it’s always because I remember something you posted.

Your sense of humour is epic! You really have no idea how many screenshots of your post I have on my phone. With every one of your post, I’m amazed at how your brain functions. You have the most randomly intelligent thoughts and you dish out the words like a mistress. You make me give the possibility of me being sapiosexual a thought but I’m not even going to claim I am, because these facebook people don’t know how to observe chill when someone uses that word. They just pounce on you.

Funny but none of the things I even feel for you is sexual. And it’s not because I still don’t know what you look like because since I started following you in December you’ve had this picture of beautiful blue skies as your dp. But I’m not complaining. I’m not in a hurry to see you. Mystery and suspense is intriguing and incredibly sexy.

But thanks to my graphic mind, I have a picture that fits this character that you are perfect. In my head, you’re a tall..say 5feet 11, dark skinned lady with full eyebrows, big brown eyes that sparkle with enthusiasm, full luscious lips, a dimple on your left cheek and when you laugh, you laugh out really loud. But Mread, even if you look nothing like this, then the way you look must be the best a lady can look. Gosh! You’re just so perfect in my eyes. And who knows, maybe seeing you might kill all this fire and I don’t want to risk that.

I’m at a loss for words to describe what you do to me that makes me yearn for more and more of your post. Mread, you close work at 4pm right? Cos your post pause at about that time and resume at about 6:30pm. I just rush all the way home within the time frame so I can see your post live and feel your mood and coolness oozing through my phone screen. I notice you complain about Old airport traffic many times, and each time I imagine I’m right beside you keeping you company so you don’t even have to post about the horror.  Lest I forget, I open your timeline in a separate tab on my office laptop so I can stay refreshing every 3mins or so. LOL. I’m not even ashamed to say any of these. After all you don’t engage my post and I don’t bother tagging you. I continue to watch you silently, fantasizing and hoping you won’t notice me. I’m really just content to love you from a distance.

I’ve never been one to read romance novels so I never had fantasies of a damsel that I want to fall in love with. In fact, maybe I’ve never really given the idea of my kind of woman a thought. But you, my darling, have given form to my ideal woman. You come across as a balanced woman, able to hold your own on every subject. And when the most ridiculous questions are thrown at you, you answer with such grace. Could this be love? LOL These unidentifiable emotions. Saying I’m in awe of you probably sums it all up. Maybe that’s why I named you my DREAM and turned the letters around to MREAD to mask my obsession. You’d never get to read this. Or maybe you would since I’m posting it on a friend’s blog soon. I hope that when you do read this, you feel butterflies in your tummy as a sign that all this is about you.

Truckload of hugs and kisses,

Joe Heman.


Do you have a facebook crush, instagram or any social media platform whatsoever? Can you relate with this love expression. Liking someone who has no idea you exist. Or maybe even does but you haven’t been able to get their attention in that direction like you’d wish you could. Please share your crush stories. ?

Categories: Lifestyle

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