Staying at home doing nothing is brutal. Gone are the days when meditation was more spirit than aesthetics, and staying at home was considered more for rest than for our existential survival.
If there’s a lesson to be learnt from all this, its that man was not built to be idle. Man was engineered to produce, to be fruitful and to multiply. I don’t mean that only in the way your reproductive mind is seeing it, you naughty human. I meant that in the ways of productivity as envisioned by Adams Smith laissez – Faire theory.
As a bachelor with too much time on my hand, I found myself indulging in the first art of creation. I used this time to read one of John Clelands lesser known works, but I had barely started when konji started acting up.
Unfortunately for me, I saw my neighbour accompany one of our neighbours into his apartment and shortly thereafter, started blaring baby making music. Hmm, Tunde you devil. For me, however, my imagination spiraled into the realms of a ludicrously lascivious act I could have the unfortunateness to imagine!
Sometimes I hold my junior and swear on my imagination. Today was one of such days.
Later in the evening, I saw Caroline the banker with one of the older banks driving into the compound in her Corrolla with one young man in her hands. Bobo was cradling a big bottle of moringa and Fayrouz.
Looks like a party; thirty minutes later, the aroma of jollof rice wafted into the compound. Smells like party jollof where you have to eat the food and its maker.
It’s either something is wrong with me, or a diminutive demon is punishing me. Here I am, there they are and the much-publicized “social distancing” is gone.
I don’t blame them really. Human beings were built to be together. I feel like a hypocrite for gossiping about their sins which I also indulge in on good days.
These have been tough times for me, single, severely underemployed (All young lawyers are underemployed), carrying a mundane title of “barrister” that gets me exploited more often than it provides the bread.
My jealousy got to it’s peak so I decided to go for lunch in Unku Emma’s house. I heard his girl was observing social distancing with him, but if I was to take an uneducated guess, I’d say they were using those sanitizers for more than hand sterilization.
With the way Unku Emma likes ropes and metals, I hope the marks on his wrist heal fast. A Taroh man that submits is rare, one that agrees to be dominated is just improbable, but again here we are.
Abeg I am tired, all this coitus others are getting around makes me want to brostitute. For the record, this is a thought of no consequence.
I am Ndam, and please avoid me, I have been coughing since before Coro came. I can’t explain it either.